andrew schulz

Andrew Schulz Is So Unbelievably Stupid and Fascist

Portrait of a charlatan.

As he’s roamed the media circuit promoting his new Netflix special these last few weeks, Andrew Schulz has claimed that Jews are successful and insular; said that if only there were reliable information that vaccines are safe, parents like him would be happy to vaccinate their children; admitted he only recently learned that Russia was involved in World War II; enthused over the idea of Trump annexing Greenland; compared, unfavorably, the burning of Teslas to the Boston Tea party; and said he's fine with denying due process to immigrants suspected of gang affiliations.

The man is unbelievably, unbearably ignorant, and his star has only risen since the 2024 election. In recent weeks he’s become a fixture on conservative media outlets, including Bari Weiss’s The Free Press and Fox News, where he’s opined at length about what the Democrats need to do to win and why the right is cool now.

In his recent appearance on Weiss’s podcast, for instance, the Trump propagandist and anti-trans crusader sought his advice for Jews in America. (Schulz is not Jewish.) He proceeded to describe more or less accurately the social function of antisemitism—as a means of scapegoating Jews for social problems whose root causes then go unaddressed—while managing to be totally antisemitic about it. To wit:

Schulz: So I think the perception of Jews from non-Jews is success and separatism. So the idea is not only they're successful, but they just look after each other. That's the perception. I don't think that perception is that wrong, based on the fact that the religion doesn't proselytize. That's not to say that Jews don't look out for other people. Like I grew up in fucking New York City. Like I, you didn't really know who was Jewish or not until like, you were like bar mitzvah age. In the city it wasn’t that big a deal.

[…]

Anyway, so perception of Jews is that they’re, a lot of times, like the only time a person is interacting with the Jews is if it's like their lawyer or their fucking like landlord or something like that. So it's also like this not exactly friendly position, right? For a lot of people. And the fact that Jews don't try to make more people be Jewish seems weird. Imagine you're a devout Christian and all you want is these people who aren't gonna go to heaven to go with you. And every Sunday they're like, “We gotta get more people to go to heaven.”

And then these Jews come around and they are the richest people in your little community, and they don't really hang out with that many people, and they don't want you to go to heaven that bad. Their heaven. What is your perspective on them, right? You're like, “what the fuck do they got?” So this is, not saying it's right. I'm just saying emotionally where people go. But as long as people can eat and they can pay their rent, and eggs aren't fucking $24, nobody’s really tripping. There’s this ambient feeling towards Jews—

Weiss: Which is what, suspicion?

Schulz: Which is what I just described. A little suspicion, a little “other.” I think it's not dissimilar to like, and I said this outside, but like how people feel about like the Rockefellers or the Vanderbilt or like any kind of like legacy American name. You're just like, they got a lot of money. And they control some shit. And it, they're doing it just for them. And I'm not in on that.

So I feel like it's a very similar feeling. But then you have to add biblical shit to it. There's no biblical shit added to the Rockefellers or the Kennedys or these people, right.? Technically they're on your team religiously. Jews don't have that. Okay, so that’s the setup. Second you can't afford shit, and the Jews still look like they’re making money and they’re doing okay, you’re like, “why the fuck?” That ambient light gets brighter. That ambient sentiment gets brighter. I think if the economy is flourishing, nobody's even thinking about Jewish conspiracies. I don't even think they're caring about it.

It strikes me that this is very similar to what Dave Smith (who had a Holocaust denier on his podcast just last week) said in 2019, in a critique of Weiss’s book How to Fight Anti-Semitism: essentially, that antisemites are correct in their perception of Jews is correct, but wrong in their reaction:

Smith: If you’re gonna say that when a society is dying, people start blaming the Jews—well, okay, but what’s the next obvious question? Why are they blaming the Jews? Why is the society dying? Do Jews have anything to do with the society dying? Are they maybe disproportionately representing the forces that are killing the society? I mean, how are you going to bring up this topic and avoid that central question, right?

So what I would say—and I’ve said before, when we’ve talked about this question—is I go, well, look. I mean, Jewish people are very overrepresented in many fields. The idea of just saying, “Oh, there’s a Jewish conspiracy,” it’s like, well, no, I don’t think there is blatantly a Jewish conspiracy—although, by the way, Jews, much like other groups, have an in-group preference, and lots of Jews like to do business with other Jews, and treat Jews differently than they treat people who are not Jews. That’s something that most Jews are at least aware of. But I think the same could be said for Chinese people, or Japanese people, or Black people, or lots of others.

And of course Schulz also echoes what Theo Von told Candace Owens a few weeks ago:

Owens: I don't hate anybody. I just hate liars. And they come in all different shapes and sizes and races and religions. You can find you a liar anywhere.

Von: Yeah. Well I do think—because there's also a lot of great things that I see. In a lot of Jewish families, they value education, they invest in their children. Those are some of the things that they do super well. They work together. Like a lot of Jewish guys that I know, they'll connect you with another Jewish guy to work with or something. They help their group. And that's something that I feel like other groups could learn how to do as well.

…Which all goes to show how effectively antisemitism—the real kind, not the calling-genocide-genocide kind—has taken root in mainstream American comedy, slipping quietly alongside other forms of conspiratorial thinking, like Schulz’s continued skepticism about vaccines. Here he is on Von’s podcast this week:

Schulz: I have a daughter and she's of the age, we're going through vaccines and stuff and it's terrifying. I was talking to Joe about this, it was like, it's the most terrifying thing you've ever experienced in your life is you have the most perfect thing you've ever created and you have to put something in them and you've watched a video on YouTube that says that it could do something horrible to her. But if you don't do it, she could get some disease that could do something horrible to her. So you're like, how do I protect my kid? There's a fork in the road and both potentially lead to horrible. How do I protect my kid?

I would love nothing more than to do intense—and I'm sure they've already done this, so if they have and call me an idiot, that's fine, I'm an idiot, whatever. But intense research into the vaccinations and I would love nothing more if we found out, hey, you know what? It looks like they are safe for them and there's very low chance cause of anything negative for your kid. How much nicer would that feel than right now what all of us new parents are feeling, which are like, do I have to delay it? Which ones? How do I protect my child? We want the research, we want it, we want to know.

Von: And I think if you gave Bobby, even if it was 20 minutes a week where he gave a speech or something and maybe that he should start doing that to update people, Robert Kennedy Jr. would say, hey, this is where things are at and we're going to try our best and this is what we're going to try to do, maybe that would be great to have some sort of an address.

Schulz: Love it. Love it.

Von: Trump's addresses, sometimes they're Trumpian. They're just like kind of the bare facts and we're going to win type shit. So maybe if you had Vance give something that was a little bit more elongated and a little bit more personal notation and feeling to it like a—

Schulz: Didn't FDR do that? I think they were called the Fireside Chats. Where he was talking to people.

Von: I think you're right, we might need something like that.

Schulz: Dude, because there's so much muck out there, there's so much bullshit information. And like we're guilty of that too. We just spout whatever on the fucking mic and who knows if it's true or not. But it'd be nice if we had information disseminated from the people in power. It might be wrong or it might be right, but they are the people in power, so we can at least hold them to that standard. If they say that they're doing this specific thing and we disagree with it, we can be like, I disagree with that.

Not to put too fine a point on it, but what’s happening here is two incredibly influential comedians lamenting the lack of good information about vaccines, then suggesting the world’s leading purveyor of anti-vaccine misinformation go out and clear things up. This is complete madness.

In that same episode, Schulz and Von enthusiastically praise Candace Owens, the neo-Nazi who has recently dedicated herself to exposing Brigitte Macron as secretly trans and Harvey Weinstein as falsely convicted. “She’s brave and she’s thorough and she’s never lost a lawsuit,” says Von. (Wrong.) Then the duo ponders whether there simply isn’t such a thing as truth, with Schulz acknowledging that he only recently learned basic facts about world history (which Von learns on-camera):

Von: I don't even know what to believe now. When I'm—you see clips and I start, but I'm like, oh, this is what I—and you're like, dude, I haven't—there's no real place to get completely factual truth. Well, maybe except your instinct.

Schulz: Yeah. But maybe because there is no complete factual truth.

Von: That could be it too.

Schulz: I think that's the thing. And I think it was probably easier when there's a few different news channels to disseminate information, like kind of we all agree on more. "This is what happened during the Civil War. This is what happened during the Revolutionary War. This is what happened during World War II." I didn't even know Russia did anything during World War II until a few years ago. I found out 25 million Russians died in World War II.

Von: Nuh-uh.

Schulz: Yeah.

Von: Are you serious?

Schulz: Yeah.

Von: Pull that up. How many Russians died in World War I? That's unbelievable. You don't ever hear about that.

Schulz: Never hear about it. But why would we teach that?

Von: Right. But it gives you a different concept of who did what.

Schulz: 27 million. Wow.

Von: Oh my God.

Schulz: Yeah. 19 million civilian deaths. 8.7 million military deaths. That's the thing with Russia is tricky is...

Von: So, they were an Allied force, right?

Schulz: Yeah. And then immediately afterwards, we started beefing in the Cold War and all that kind of stuff. But, yeah, we had a united cause at one point in time because I think Hitler invaded Russia.

Von: Oh, wow.

Schulz: Yeah. But the problem with invading Russia is they have a cultural acceptance of misery.

Von: Right. So, they kind of like it in the beginning. Is that what you're saying?

Schulz: Of war, you're saying? They're like, "Oh, finally. We're back to homeostasis."

Von: "Be our guest, be our guest. Come on out."

Schulz: Yeah, exactly. So, I don't know, I just feel like, Americans, we like it. We like nice shit. We like it being comfortable. We're brave, that's what I will say. I don't have concerns about us losing a war.

Von: Yeah.

Schulz: Because I do think that we value freedom. I don't think we would ever accept being controlled by another country. I think that the majority of us would rather die before that happened.

Von: Right. Or we just don't know that it's happening.

Schulz: Here you go again. Theo, what country are you talking about, Theo? Theo? Candace, see what you started?

Here I will put too fine a point on it: Von’s suggestion at the end there is that Israel is secretly controlling the US. Hmm, it’s almost like it’s bad to hang out with Nazis.

Elsewhere on his media circuit, Schulz stopped by the Will Cain Show on Fox News to endorse Trump’s expansionist aims:

Schulz: How much fun is the idea of taking land again? You know what I mean?

Cain: Real fun.

Schulz: It is kind of fun.

Cain: Who doesn't want Greenland?

Schulz: Everybody. Everybody. No, we shouldn't take land. You know what I mean? Where's my camera? I think but here's the thing. Do we know what the people ... Do we know what the Greenlanders think? What an upgrade.

Cain: There's 50,000 of them.

Schulz: Yeah.

Cain: Even if they don't want it, that's a big Super PAC ad blitz and we're good. Right?

Schulz: I think that we could convince them. It's hearts and minds.

Cain: I think we could.

Schulz: Hearts and minds. Just show 'em Miami in December. When they're freezing their [bleep] off in a tuque-tuque or whatever in Greenland, just be like, "This is what it looks like in Miami in December." And then you're on board. What do they got over there? They got minerals. Is that the idea?

Cain: That's what they say. They got a lot of land. Most of it covered in ice.

Schulz: Yeah, but we don't want the land. We're not going to do anything over there.

Cain: Like, back to your point, I like more land.

Schulz: Oh, got it. I like conquering, I think.

Cain: There's only 50,000.

Schulz: That's a good point. Why doesn't Canada do that? Why doesn't Canada just take over a Caribbean island?

Cain: What has Canada ever taken over?

Schulz: Let me think about that. Nothing, huh?

Schulz is clearly all-in on Trumpism—even the most explicitly fascist elements, like the hypothetical designation of Tesla burnings as domestic terrorism and the disappearance of immigrants to slave labor camps. Here he is on the former, in an episode of his own podcast this week:

Schulz: “Terrorism, broadly defined, is a calculated use of violence or the threat of violence since fear and achieve political or ideological goals, often targeting civilians or non-combatants.” It’s absolutely instilling fear, right? And for a political agenda. They don't like his politics, so they're attacking one of his businesses. This has nothing to do with the quality of the cars. This is an American car manufacturer. The people that make Teslas are Americans. 100% of Teslas sold in America are made by Americans in America. You can't say that for Ford, you can't say that for GMC. Can't say that for any other car producer in America, I'm pretty sure. So this is an act of aggression on American automakers that will lose their jobs if Tesla tanks and cannot sell cars anymore. So you are attacking Americans when you're doing this.

[...]

For real, to me, I think this is disgusting and it's motivated by political agenda. It's just, I don't agree with this guy's politics so we're going to attack his business, which ultimately will hurt Americans. Yeah, I just think it's gross. I think it's disgusting. I think it's fucked up.

Schulz and his cohosts then try to figure out whether the burnings are anything like the Boston Tea Party, with Schulz somehow coming out against the latter:

Akaash Singh: Well, tea was, oh yeah. I guess it was hurting the government specifically, not... I guess, yeah. I guess it's hurting Elon's pockets and he's in the government.

Schulz: Well, the tea was, there were private—

Dov Mamann: East India Trading Company.

Schulz: Yeah. Which is a private company. Publicly traded. But no, so it was a publicly traded company just like Tesla is. So they're attacking that. And then the idea was is the East India Trading Company would hope that England would protect their business interests in America because England was the beneficiary with that tax revenue. So yeah, this is exactly what they're doing. So they better hope they're right. What does that say? The difference between terrorism and revolutionary is the victor?

Singh: Yeah.

Mark Gagnon: Terrorist and freedom fighter?

Schulz: Yeah. So yeah, we'll see what happens.

Dov: I think the difference with this is burning a car could affect a lot of people. You could catch a large fire. Throwing tea overboard doesn't affect people possibly.

Singh: Also, they're not just doing it to Tesla dealerships, they're doing it to owners of Tesla's as well.

Gagnon: Yeah, it's not knocking someone's tea out their hand.

Singh: Yeah. Taking someone's tea from their house and then setting it on fire.

Schulz: But there were people working on that ship that had to move the tea and that was their job. And then if the East India Trading Company stops, or Dutch East India Trading Company stops doing it, they're out of a job. Those people suffer.

That's what I'm trying to say, is it's not like this is a foreign car manufacturer and we're protesting them because we're at war with them. Let's say we're at war with Germany and we're like no more Porsches, no more Mercedes. All right, bet. Stop it. Done. All these cars are made in America. One hundred percent of the Teslas sold in America are made here fully. Not the shit like with Ford where like 30% of it is made in some other country and then you kind of put it together here. They're all made here. So this is as American as it gets when it comes to the automotive industry. I feel like it's something we should maybe protect. Is there another business we could protest? Protest SpaceX. I don't give a fuck about that.

Finally, in a Patreon-exclusive episode released today, Schulz and company tried to figure out whether immigrants have rights:

Schulz: Let's say that person has—and it's tricky. It's like, "Do you give every person that's on American land the rights to every American citizen?" I think there is a rule that if you are here, you get those rights, even if you're here illegally.

Media: Like due process? I think everyone should have it.

Schulz: ...Well, the follow-up question is this. Let's say there's somebody that you apprehend and he has a gang tattoo from one of these El Salvadorian gangs.

Singh: MS-13 tattoo or whatever.

Schulz: Exactly. Is that enough to deport him? He's here illegally. You can deport him based on his illegal status.

Singh: Yes.

Schulz: Now for me, I'm not going off of any legislation. Right? I'm literally just going, "I don't want no fucking illegal gangbanger here." If you're a guy and you're like working hard, you're doing all these things. Now there's probably some guy who maybe was part of MS-13 and then he changed his life and he got a job.

Singh: Get the tattoo removed, buddy.

Schulz: I mean...

Singh: That thing exists. You know what I mean? We're acting like that technology's not out there.

Schulz: But I wonder if now that's what they would do in El Salvador. They're like, "If you have any connection to the gang, we're locking your ass up. We don't give a fuck. No due processing." And maybe if you're here illegally and you have that kind of connectivity with the gang, you see some gang-affiliated tattoos, you're like, "Yo, you don't need to rape. We're not going to wait for you to rape, murder, or sell drugs. You're fucking out of here.” I'm okay with that, but does that break some American law?

Gagnon: I mean, if they came illegally?

Schulz: Yeah.

Gagnon: Then yeah, they're already in violation. That's the criminal thing that's a little vague is like, "Yeah, we're going to deport the criminals." Well, if you already are here illegally, you already are a criminal."

Singh: That's what this is. That's a loophole. Okay.

Gagnon: But then you have to be convicted because even, I think due to this due process is all people.

Mamann: I think there's also a loophole where it's if you enter illegally, it's illegal. But if you enter legally and overstay, it's not illegal. It's a civil problem. It's not a criminal...

Gagnon: That makes sense.

Schulz: So if you come through—

Singh: I'm okay with that, though. But you got here legally and now, you overstayed your welcome. I don't think you're a criminal. That's a civil matter.

Media: You're just lazy.

Gagnon: A lot of... but I get it. I've been lax on some legal matters.

Schulz: Son, I lived a year in Spain. I didn't even get my visa. They told me to go get the visa. They're like the first month I was there, you have to go to the thing and get the visa. And I'm like, "Or what?" I just never got it. I was like, "What are you going to do? Send me back to the best country ever?"

I’m okay with that, but does that break some American law? Behold, a man who definitely cares about the law.

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Andrew Schulz Is So Unbelievably Stupid and Fascist

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