Theo Von: Trans People Should Have "Separate" Bathrooms, Sports Leagues

In a conversation with musician and Trump supporter Kid Rock released today, the comedian Theo Von argues that there should be “separate” locker rooms and even sports leagues for trans people. He made this proposal in response to a noxious transphobic rant by Kid Rock, née Robert James Ritchie, about the recent controversy over Planet Fitness’s gender non-discrimination policy—a controversy, it should be noted, that was started by stochastic terrorist Chaya Raichik, also known as Libs of TikTok. 

As usual, I think it is worth seeing for yourself just how comfortable these people are indulging in straightforward hate speech. The relevant passage is below, lightly edited for clarity. As you read Von attempt to rationalize his transphobia as concern for the welfare of children, bear in mind that he is friends with alleged sex predator and groomer Chris D’Elia:

KID ROCK: There was a biological male in the women's locker room. I guess there was a little girl in there and somebody, a lady, took a picture of that biological male, who was trans, shaving. Posted it. Planet Fitness kicked her out for taking the picture. And then somebody at the company, it was a COO or somebody, put out a statement about, you know, "We want to create an inclusive environment at Planet Fitness." Like, Planet Fitness. Try fitness dick in your mouth. You motherfuckers are done right there.

VON: We did. Well—

KID ROCK: It's bananas after what's going on right now. 

VON: Well, this is just bananas. First of all, if this is what's—if this is—you shouldn't then allow children and adults in the same locker room. Because that's, if there's a child in there, that's—

KID ROCK: I mean, if a lady's with her daughter or something, who cares? I mean, this dude wants to work out at Planet Fitness, go for it. Nobody cares. Nah, you're not going in the fucking women's locker room and shaving your neck. 

VON: Zoom in on the dude. 

KID ROCK: Come on, man. What the fuck? 

VON: I agree, bro. This—

KID ROCK: What the fuck is going on?

VON: But then here's what—should they just have—

KID ROCK: If you look at that and go like, "ah, no big deal." Like, just stay the fuck out of my space. My private space is—out in public, I could deal with anybody. I'm a freedom-loving American and unfortunately that means there's a lot of weird shit that could happen. I'm cool with that, but my private space is—just stay the fuck away from me.

VON: So where does somebody like this—they just go to the men's room, then, you're thinking. I guess I just, I wonder if you're—they should just have a separate room, then, for trans people.

KID ROCK: Yeah. You wanna create an inclusive place? Here, create your fucking non-binary, whatever that shit is.

VON: I agree. Have one extra restroom, then, that's for trans people. But then you're gonna get to the point where somebody's like, well then we need a re—that is part of the road that you go down, when you go down that kind of stuff. But yeah, I agree. Dude, this would be so—and if you have a child in there, it's like, I was at the airport in Los Angeles and there's a gender—

KID ROCK: Neutral—

VON: Restroom. And a kid went in, and then a guy went in. And I'm just like—maybe not a kid, but probably 12. Part of me's like—

KID ROCK: I don't care if it's just my grandmother and her friends hanging out or—still, like, nah, get the fuck outta here. What are you doing? Cut it out. Just cut it out. 

VON: They just had Caitlyn Jenner was just talking about this.

KID ROCK: Caitlyn Jenner kinda gets it.

VON: Yeah. They just had this article—Caitlyn Jenner backs New York county's ban on trans women competing on women's sports. I still don't—

KID ROCK: Common sense. 

VON: I agree. I don't understand why this is such an issue. Just have a trans division. What is the problem with that?

KID ROCK: See, I would actually watch that.

VON: Oh, I've said this before—

KID ROCK: Trans boxing? Oh, you're not turning that off. 

VON: In a heartbeat. 

KID ROCK: You know what I mean?

VON: Trans any—

KID ROCK: And what if you'd then had like trans midget boxing? 

VON: Gosh. Do they have trans little pe—do they have trans midgets?

KID ROCK: Got to.

VON: You think?

KID ROCK: I do a lot of Google searches for midgets. But my buddy's got this genius idea. You know Brad, my friend Brad. He's got this genius idea to do a Civil War reenactment with all little people. 

VON: Oh yeah. 

KID ROCK: Like, General Robert E. Wee.

VON: I love that idea.

KID ROCK: I love little people, man.

Let us put in plain language what Von and Kid Rock are advocating for here: segregation. Of course, many states have already passed laws that ban trans people from using facilities consistent with their gender identity in some or all government buildings, and two states—Utah and Florida—have gone so far as to criminalize the very act. The conservative movement is working tirelessly to eliminate trans people from public life, with the ACLU currently tracking 479 bills that would enact some form of assault on the rights of LGBTQ people. It’s dirty work, but at least they’ve got some of the most popular comedians in the world on their side.

Meanwhile in Austin, Joe Rogan sat down with his friend Joey Diaz—the comedian who once bragged that he coerced women into giving him sexual favors in exchange for stage time at the Comedy Store—for some truly bonkers fear-mongering about immigration, suggesting that undocumented migrants may be forming “terrorist cells” and that “young, fit” Chinese people are sneaking into the US for nefarious purposes. 

Please see for yourself. I will simply note that the talking point about New York giving migrants $10,000 is not remotely true, though that hasn’t stopped Rogan from saying it in multiple recent episodes, namely his conversations with Kurt Metzger, Riley Gaines, and Katt Williams. 

DIAZ: Listen, man, this migrant situation has turned everything around. From New York City, Chicago, LA, they're everywhere. And you know, tax money, and New York's giving you $10,000 now. An ATM card. Right? They give you $10,000 if you're a migrant.

ROGAN: Something along those lines, yeah.

DIAZ: You know, and I dunno. There's a lot to say, like. You know, look at our fucking vets, how they get treated. 

ROGAN: I'm gonna send you this, Jamie. See what's going on in Paris. They started, they were trying to kick these dudes out of the country, and they started a riot at the airport. 

DIAZ: Who are they trying to kick out?

ROGAN: Illegal immigrants. I'll show you. Jamie, I just sent it to you. And they're like, no, we're not going. They're like, you have to go, there's too many of you. They're like, no, fuck you, we're not flying. And they started a riot at the airport. They were trying to deport 'em, and they're like, uh-uh, we're here.

DIAZ: Listen, all I remember is one thing, Joe and I use this, and I'm not saying nothing bad about anybody. I was—

ROGAN: Look at this. Gimme the volume. It is a full-on donnybrook at the airport. They're beating up attendants. Security guys are getting fucked up. Wild shit, man.

DIAZ: So they got 'em over there too? 

ROGAN: Yeah, they have a lot, a lot, a lot of migrants in Europe. Yeah. It's basically, it happened right after the pandemic en mass. It's just massive amounts of migrants in Europe. Massive amounts of migrants here. It's almost like it's on purpose. If it's not on purpose, what a coincidence.

DIAZ: But it just, it seemed like there just wasn't migrants coming in. But what I was telling you before was, I think I told you last time. I saw what the Mariel boatlift did to my area, Hudson County, not in 1979, but I saw it five years later. And then I saw what they were doing in San Francisco. When I got to San Francisco in '85, there was a huge Cuban population. 

ROGAN: San Francisco. So this is the people that took off—

DIAZ: —From Mariel in ’78,’ 79.

ROGAN: Is this when Fidel kicked them out? 

DIAZ: Yes. He kicked out 160,000 people. We didn't have records on these people, so we didn't really know what they were about. They could just tell you, I worked in construction, you know, and they didn't know. So this is that, but 10 times. 

ROGAN: Right. 

DIAZ: That was 100,000 people, 200,000. This is 8 million or something like that, right? That come through?

ROGAN: At least.

DIAZ: You're not gonna feel this today. You're gonna feel this five years from now.

ROGAN: Well, they could feel it real soon depending upon who the people are and why they're here. You know, the most troubling version is sleeper cells. The most troubling version is that there's military cells that exist here. Terrorist cells.

DIAZ: The Chinese are coming in. And now they're growing weed. 

ROGAN: Are they? Chinese?

DIAZ: Jamie, go to the videotape. Chinese are buying farms. You just had somebody on here that was talking about the Chinese are buying farms here.

ROGAN: Yes. They're definitely buying farms.

DIAZ: What do you think they're doing with those fucking farms? Raising fucking sushi? No, they're fucking growing reefer.

ROGAN: "Department of Homeland Security memo, first reported by the Daily Caller, received as a part of a Freedom of Information Act request, said that more than 270 unlicensed cannabis cultivation sites in Maine were operated by Chinese nationals."

DIAZ: Who the fuck you think you're dealing with? […] The fuck you think they're doing? Growing fucking beans sprouts or soy sprouts? They're going for it, Jack. Well,

ROGAN: They're controlling farmland that's around military bases. That's what's scary.

DIAZ: And a lot of Chinese were coming through the border with these guys.

ROGAN: Yeah, military age.

DIAZ: A lot of Chinese. So let's see where this hand is getting played.

ROGAN: Not only a lot of Chinese, but they have Chinese stops where you can go and everybody speaks Chinese along the way, and they have a Chinese restaurant. Everything's written in Chinese, Chinese signs everywhere. So they have like a very specific organized route to get to America. And these guys, all young fit guys coming to America. Like, what are you doing? Like, what the fuck is going on here? We're just basically sitting ducks.

DIAZ: We'll wait.

ROGAN: Yeah, we're sitting ducks. And there was a big warning today. Homeland Security is warning about terrorist attacks in America. That's what scares me about this fucking election too. 'm not saying that they would do this, but I definitely think they have in the past. Like, allowed things to happen. Just so they can tighten up on restrictions and laws and scare people more and get people to vote one way or another. Scary shit. 

I often describe Rogan and other comedians in his sphere as mini Tucker Carlsons, but I don’t think the analogy is accurate anymore. Carlson has effectively faded into obscurity since he left Fox News. His YouTube channel currently has 1.83 million subscribers; Theo Von has nearly twice that, while Rogan has 16.4 million. (He is also by far the most popular podcaster on Spotify, with 14.5 million followers.) They’ve assumed Carlson’s role in popular culture without any of the reputational liability or scrutiny from liberal-to-left media. They are propagandists without constraint or principle or even object permanence, and more importantly, without anything resembling criticism from anyone in their own social-professional milieu, the only people they actually respect: other comedians.

As Rogan put it, this is all scary shit.